Smark Out Moment

Welcome to another edition of WOMEN'S WRESTLING WEEKLY—a rundown of the events which have transpired in the world of women's professional wrestling over the past several days not just with the Superstars on WWE programming, but with Impact Wrestling's Knockouts, Lucha Underground's luchadoras, and even a glimpse at the women on the independent circuit.

Happy December, everyone! We're winding down the year, yes, but WWE is chugging along to TLC. Lucha Underground is in hiatus, but that doesn't mean that we don't still have some awesomeness to expect from Taya Valkyrie. That said... well. Not much to discuss this week, honestly. Raw was a massive disappointment, while SmackDown shone and Impact continued to build its women's division's momentum with some exciting twists and turns! Let's dive in!



This Raw was bad and so was this segment

I try to provide insightful analysis more than just plain recaps, because I think that's more interesting than regular results, but man. I cannot believe I watched this show. It was just.. really ill-advised. Let's go through all of the mistakes made, shall we?

First, Nia Jax cut a promo. Not exactly her strongest suit, especially as a heel. She lacks the veracity to make it fun. Oh, and Tamina was... there, kind of. Enter Ronda Rousey, who is also not the kind of performer I want to hear cut a drawn-out promo. Rousey said Nia was from a, and I QUOTE, "warrior culture" and not much else that I cared about, because wow, really? They exchanged threats before Natalya came out to even the odds against Jax and Tamina, and then the Riott Squad appeared for some reason, and I just...

Man, these women deserve better.

Ember Moon vs. Alicia Fox

Ember Moon's replacement in the Mixed Match Challenge for Braun Strowman? Curt Hawkins. Weep with me, my brethren.

This match was over in a blink, and Ember won with an Eclipse. Nothing to analyze here because nothing means anything anymore.

God, I hated this episode... elsewhere, Bayley and Sasha were brought out for an open forum by Boss!Bliss, and lo and behold, they were ambushed!

Winner: Ember Moon
Rating: 1/5



The Man Cometh Back + Battle Royal

Oh HELL yes, our lord and savior is back, and she was EXACTLY what we needed to watch after such a dismal Raw. Lynch wasted no time in calling the new and improved Charlotte Flair out so that they could exchange some delicious trash talk. And boy, we are truly in a blessed timeline to have both of them as heels and fighting AT THE SAME TIME! Their energy is electric and revitalized, especially now that Flair has free reign to be the same heel that rocketed her to the top in the first place.

Lynch gave Charlotte the rematch she craved at TLC, but then the entire women's division emerged, demanding a chance. Which was...yeah, fair. So, Paige organized a battle royal, where the winner would be added to Flair and Lynch's title match.

I won't plague you by describing all the craziness that went down here, so I'll just share the end: Asuka eliminated Sonya Deville to face Becky and Charlotte at TLC!

...deep breaths, folks...

YES!!!!! How many weeks have i lamented on this column how very wasted Asuka has been? Win or lose, this match is exactly what she needs to remind everyone why she was such a monster in the first place.

Winner: Asuka
Rating: 3.5/5



Jordynne Grace vs. Katarina

Jordynne Grace is, my friends, lightning in a bottle. She is so intense and so fun to watch. Though Katarina controlled much of the early match, Grace took command convincingly and won with her magnificent bear hug, which looks just brutal.

I said, when she first debuted, that I thought her style would translate well to television, and I'm so excited to see her look so fun in her first few matches. Katarina is a good opponent to showcase Grace's grittiness.

Winner: Jordynne Grace
Rating: 3/5

Taya Valkyrie vs. Ray Lyn

Um, Taya... what?! What is that?!

I felt kinda guilty watching sweet little Ray Lyn be subjected to Taya's smug chops... but not TOO guilty, because Taya Valkyrie freaking rocks. She won the very short match very quickly with a new submission maneuver... I don't know what to call it. It's kind of like a crossface? Whatever, it's dope.

After, Tessa Blanchard attacked Taya, and then proceeded to maul the referees when they tried to stop her. It took physical intervention from, um *checks notes* GAIL KIM to distract Blanchard so that Taya could hit her with a sick spear.

Well... all hail Gail Kim!

Winner: Taya Valkyrie
Rating: 1.5/5



Mia Yim vs. Vanessa Bourne

Oh man, I'll never get tired of seeing Mia Yim succeed. Despite some early aggression and a sick Bronco Buster, Vanessa could not keep Yim down, and the latter defeated her with the ever-awesome Seoul Food.

Elsewhere, Goth!Candice LeRae is still lurking... and since there's no videos on Youtube for any of this stuff, take a look at our UK Women's Champ!

Winner: Mia Yim
Rating: 2.5/5



I have no snark about reality television to offer this week for the Total Divas finale because this week was all too real in a very painful way.

As an audience, we weren't too akin to the extent of Jim Neidhart's health problems until this episode. Natalya deals with his deteriorating health about as well as anyone can expect. I went through a similar experience watching my grandfather get sicker and sicker until he passed away in April. I felt echoes of that hopelessness and grief watching Natalya's journey. And as intrusive as I felt watching her deliver the eulogy at Jim's funeral, it was extremely moving seeing her wearing his jacket at SummerSlam next to the footage of him in that same jacket.

Reality can be agonizing. Loss sucks. It just really freaking sucks, and death is a dark part of reality. But for once, I can say that Total Divas got something right here.

Ironically, it's by sticking to, well, reality.



This section includes recaps of matches from around the world in various lesser-known independent promotions throughout the week.

Asistencia Asesoria y Administracion

Match: Lady Shani, Maximo & Pimpinela Escarlata vs. Faby Apache, La Mascara & Villano III Jr.
Winner: Lady Shani, Maximo & Pimpinela Escarlat

STARDOM

Match: Momo Watanabe vs. Natsu Sumire (Wonder of STARDOM Title match)
Winner: Momo Watanabe

PROGRESS

Match: Jordynne Grace vs. Isla Dawn
Winner: Jordynne Grace


What? I like chaos every once in a while. And I like Asuka getting big wins ALWAYS.


I refuse to NOT put Becky, but I feel it's only fair to include the woman whose victory of my match of the week sent the internet into a frenzy. All back aboard the Asuka hype train?

So there you have it, the breakdown for the week in women's wrestling. What were some of your favorite and least favorite moments from these women? Let us know your thoughts in the comments below!