Smark Out Moment

I don't like to start my year off with TNA, but here we are and the first pay-per-view of the year is TNA Genesis. The lineup looks halfway decent, even if some big names are missing (Anderson, Sting, Jarrett, Styles, etc). Let's hope Dixie Carter had a New Year's resolution to improve the product.  

PREDICTIONS: Blind shots in the dark as always, I'm going with Roode, Morgan/Crimson, Austin Aries (though I wouldn't be shocked if Sorensen won), Gail Kim, Abyss, Angle, Gunner, and Pope.

Story of the night is naturally Jeff Hardy with the intro. Makes sense, seeing as that's the world championship match. I'll give them credit, TNA does tend to put more focus on the world title than WWE does at times (cough *Rock* cough)

X-Division Championship: Austin Aries (c) vs. Kid Kash vs. Zema Ion vs. Jesse Sorensen
I'm definitely starting to re-think my pick of Austin Aries and lean towards Sorensen winning...but since the match hasn't started yet and there's no eliminations, that might just be me second-guessing myself. Aries starts the match off by leaving the ring (smart, especially since he's a heel). Nice spot in the corner with a suplex/power bomb combination between Sorensen, Ion, and Kash. Ion corkscrews from the top rope to the outside onto Aries and Kash. Sorensen follows it up with a splash of his own to that trio. Good match so far. Ion hits a 450 on Kash. Kid Kash is eliminated. Aries follows it up with a 450 of his own on Sorensen, but Jesse kicks out. Expecting Ion to be the next eliminated, probably by Aries. Sorensen almost eliminates Aries with a crossbody from the top rope. Zema Ion is eliminated after Sorensen catches him with an inside cradle. Guess I was wrong about Aries eliminating Ion. Aries puts Sorensen in a small package of his own, but the ref is distracted by Ion. Sorensen then gets a pin on Aries but the ref is still distracted, leading to Aries being able to eventually kick out. Ion isn't leaving, he's hanging out ringside. Sorensen climbs to the top rope and is taken down by Ion. As he's dangling, Aries dropkicks him, then gives him a brainbuster from the middle rope! Aries pins and eliminates Sorensen.

WINNER: Austin Aries via pinfall.
Good match to start the pay-per-view off with. 1-0 predictions so far.

Backstage with Borash and Devon's Kids
Devon's kids and Pope stumble over all their words while Borash fails at interviewing them because of it.

Devon vs. The Pope D'angelo Dinero
Devon's in full control at the start of the match. Devon climbs to the top rope but Pope pushes the ref into it, knocking Devon down. Oddly, the match slows down when Pope is in control. I would think the opposite considering how much more athletic Burke is than Devon. Pope invites Devon's kids into the ring. Ref is doing nothing but watching Pope tell them to attack Devon. The kids aren't doing anything, so Pope goes after them and beats them down. Now Devon is hulking up. This would have been a disqualification naturally, but you know how wrestling goes - if the storyline calls for it not to be, they ignore the rules. Pope misses the DDE, Devon capitalizes and wins.

WINNER: Devon via pinfall.
Meh. Not awful, not great. If I were booking things, I'd have had Devon lay out Pope, then go check up on his kids and Pope win by taking advantage of that, then they could have a gimmick match at the next ppv to end the feud. 1-1 predictions.

Backstage with Borash, Sting, and Velvet Sky
Velvet wants Karen Angle's position. I've got a position for her. What, a wrestler? You think I meant something else? That goes without being said. She suggests to Sting that she can keep Madison away from the Knockouts title match and calls it "the Velvet Touch". *Ahem* insert another joke.

Gunner vs. RVD
They must really be fond of Gunner, with all the attention they've given him over the past year and putting him with Flair and everything. Stale match so far. Exposed concrete comes into play again, particularly a DDT from Gunner while Flair distracts the referee. Gunner puts him in the ring and pins him.

WINNER: Gunner via pinfall.
Didn't like it. It felt kind of pointless for a pay-per-view match. 2-1 predictions.

After the match, they take RVD out on a stretcher.

Backstage with Borash and Hardy
Jeff Hardy starts quoting his music.

Knockouts Championship: Gail Kim (c) vs. Mickie James
Okay, so the "Velvet Touch" thing is a cage for Madison Rayne to be locked inside. I just noticed a sign in the crowd that says "even I could beat Scott Steiner", haha. Gail Kim's music sounds so familiar but I can't place it. Anyone want to help me out with that? As I said before, Gail works so much better in TNA than in WWE. Mickie on the other hand I think was much better in WWE. Madison tosses brass knuckles down for Gail to use, but the ref sees this. When he tosses them away, Madison throws another pair down, but Mickie uses them and gets disqualified.

WINNER: Gail Kim via disqualification.
Better women's wrestling match than you'll see in WWE this month. 3-1 predictions.

Backstage with Borash and Bully Ray
Ray really is one of the best on the mic in TNA right now. Shame he has one of the worst haircuts.

Monster's Ball: Abyss vs. Bully Ray
Ray comes out and randomly almost hits SoCal Val with a kendo stick. What's the purpose in Val? Does she do anything? I haven't seen her be worth a pay check in God knows how long. Ray plays some mind games with Abyss. Dueling chairs starts us off. Ray wins. Seems like Abyss got his finger caught in the chair. Ray tries to whip him with his chain but Abyss blocks it with a chair. Ray smacks Abyss in the head with a trash can but he doesn't sell it at all. Abyss finds Janice under the ring (the block of wood with nails in it for those that don't know). Ray leaves and says he's not continuing the match. Abyss goes after him and they start fighting on the stage...but they basically do nothing but a few punches and go back to the ring. That was lame. Abyss gets thrown into the barbwire board. Ray then takes it and hits Abyss in the head with it (and it falls onto a kid in the audience, that's a lawsuit waiting to happen). Abyss hits Ray's crotch with the cheese grater. (What other thing than wrestling is that not a weird sentence to say?) Out come the tacks. Ray low blows Abyss and then says "oh, my balls" and "mother fucker, my balls!" [hahaha]. Ray gets choke slammed through a table, but it's just a two-count. Ray gives a uranage to Abyss on the barbed wire board, then tosses the other board on top of him and splashes on top of it from the rope. Abyss kicks out. Abyss choke slams Ray onto the tacks, two-count. Ray just beats Abyss down with a kendo stick repeatedly. Out of nowhere, Abyss hits a Black Hole Slam on top of the barbed wire and wins the match.

WINNER: Abyss via pinfall.
Hardcore spots are always entertaining, generally speaking. There's been much better in the past, but oh well. 4-1 predictions.

Backstage with Borash (surprised?) and the Tag Team Champs
Destroying lives is what Crimson does apparently, and Matt Morgan temporarily goes back to his stuttering gimmick when he calls Samoa Joe Crimson instead.

Tag Team Championship: Crimson & Matt Morgan (c) vs. Samoa Joe & Magnus
Who did Joe piss off to make him go from one of the top guys in the company to not having a solid push in such a long time? In the middle of this match, they do a split screen to show that Abyss is being beaten down backstage by Bully Ray. I guess that shows the importance of the tag title match, right? There's a 50/50 split chant going on of "We want Morgan" and "no we don't!" Crimson and Morgan aren't dominating the match as much as I thought they would. They double-team Magnus, though, and with what looked like a double chokeslam, they win the match and retain the titles.

WINNERS: Crimson and Matt Morgan via pinfall.
Generic kind of 5 out of 10 match. 5-1 predictions.

Backstage with Borash and Storm
Storm believes in himself. He says during the match, Angle might be sucking, but after, he'll be swallowing...his foot down his throat.

James Storm vs. Kurt Angle
Gail Kim's husband is shown on camera when Storm is coming to the ring. Why now instead of during the Knockouts match? Odd. Story of the match is that Angle wants to wrestle, Storm wants to make it a fight, as those are the two elements they're more used to. I don't see how a top rope moonsault works in the "mat wrestling" style, though. Kurt Angle is able to hit a low blow on Storm and win the match that way.

WINNER: Kurt Angle via pinfall.
6-1 predictions. I actually kind of like the end to this match as it shows a hypocritical side to Angle, seeing as he's the heel and just not only cheated to win but also went against his whole strict wrestling concept.

Backstage with Bully Ray (no Borash)
Ray is cleaning up his wounds and they ask where Abyss is. He says he doesn't know, "maybe he took the rest of the night off".

TNA Championship: Bobby Roode (c) vs. Jeff Hardy
Hardy's got the opposite position in the company from Samoa Joe. If they're smart, they won't have Hardy win the title here. Roode's starting to look like a legit main eventer to me, so that's another reason why to keep the title on him (the other being Hardy's problems in the past). There's not much pure action to talk about here, sorry. Crossfaces, Whisper in the Wind, you know how it goes. Twist of Fate reversals. Twice in the match, Roode goes to grab his belt and leave with an attempted count out that Hardy has to stop. Roode kicks the ref in the crotch to get himself disqualified.

WINNER: Jeff Hardy via disqualification.
Why is it that TNA tends to take one idea and run with it multiple times on a ppv? There are lots of events where nearly every match has an interference, or nearly every match someone blades, and now this one was all low blows. It's not creative at all to have Angle win with a low blow, then Roode low blow the ref, and like 10 low blows in the other matches.