Smark Out Moment

Stay tuned to watch Bobby Roode get his well-deserved rematch against TNA champion Kurt Angle. Oh wait a minute, that's not on the card and James Storm is the champ? Ok, then I guess tune in to see Kurt Angle get his well-deserved re-...wait, Roode's the champion? Ok well I guess a triple threat for...ok Angle's not here...ok Storm is injured, well fuck, here's AJ Styles...ok AJ is injured. It appears as though TNA has made a Turning Point in the wrong direction. Tune in to see if they can dig themselves out of this hole.

PREDICTIONS: Roode retains the title (unless TNA is really going to push their luck), Aries retains the X-Division title, Robbie E wins the TV title, Anderson and Abyss beat Ray and Steiner, RVD beats Daniels, Crimson beats Matt Morgan (unless Morgan is in heel mode and in line for a push and they want to start a feud between the two that means something), Mexican America retain their titles, Gail probably beats Velvet since she's relatively new, and Jeff Hardy beats Jeff Jarrett. Again, don't you dare bet money on my TNA predictions as I'm not responsible for your loss if I'm dead wrong...but if I'm right and you win, check out the donate button to the right :)

The pay-per-view starts off comparing Roode to the lies of politicians in the past (primarily ex-Presidents). I wouldn't go that far.

Television Championship: Robbie E vs. Eric Young
Eric starts off immediately locking up with the referee, then runs around the outside of the ring. The crowd's mostly behind Eric Young (but there's a few women or kids, can't tell which, that are rooting for Robbie afterward instead). I'm personally hoping Robbie wins the match myself. Eric pulls his pants down revealing some GTW shorts. Why can't that happen in a Knockouts match instead? Young hits an elbow drop but Robbie T pulls Robbie E out of the ring to break up the pinfall. Young then pulls off the GTW ring gear to reveal some standard trunks underneath that. Again, I'd rather see Velvet Sky do this. Robbie T interferes again and Robbie ends up winning the title.

WINNER (and new TV champion): Robbie E via pinfall.
Ok opening match. Nothing special or memorable.

Tag Team Championship: Mexican America (c) vs. Ink Inc
Good idea to have Jesse Neal come out with the American flag, I like that. He has the background for it, it's around Veteran's Day, and it works with their current feud. Here's another positive - I like Mexican America better than the Hunico/Epico/Primo team WWE currently has. See, I give TNA fair credit for things they do well. There's a sign in the crowd that just says "pork". Either there's a joke there that's gone over my head or this person picked an odd sign to hold up in this match specifically. Looks like Jesse and Hernandez are being booked as the power with Anarquia and Shannon as the fragile agile ones. There's a botch where Hernandez tosses Anarquia into the ropes and he misses hitting his head on the turnbuckles. Toxxin goes to pin Sarita, but Hernandez pulls her off. For some reason afterward, Toxxin just goes and sits in the corner while Neal and Moore take care of Hernandez. Then she and Neal go after Anarquia...and strip his pants off. Two times in two matches someone has their pants taken off? Really, TNA? Then they follow this up with the obligatory "Rosita interferes, Sarita hits Toxxin with the title belt and wins the match" outcome.

WINNERS: Mexican America via pinfall.
Not as interesting as I was hoping, and the repetitive pants-off and interference for the heel to win is stupid.

Backstage, Borash asks Kid Kash and Austin Aries if it'll be a handicapped match or a true 3-way match. Aries says yes, it will be, but not because Jesse is retarded (if he said that in WWE he'd be fired off the bat probably) but because he doesn't stand a chance.

X-Division Championship [Triple Threat]: Austin Aries (c) vs. Kid Kash vs. Jesse Sorensen
So Jesse really brings a football to the ring? Ridiculous. This is wrestling. Nobody (of sound mind) would come to a football game tossing a baseball back and forth in the parking lot. The match starts off with both Aries and Kash going after Jesse, who keeps running away and simultaneously beckoning them on to come get him. That must have been the same person who thought the football idea was good (and if those are both Jesse's ideas...c'mon man). They feel the need to distract the ref for a low blow, even though this has no disqualifications. Simple double-team action that is boring the crowd as well as myself. And talk about cliches, here's the "Jesse makes Aries hit Kash" setup to make the triple-threat turn into a true triple-threat match later on. How much do you want to bet that despite the whole match being a double team, they'll have Jesse win the title? I can't wait for this match to be over with as nothing of interest is going on and it's just dragging and making me feel restless. Kash hits his finisher on Sorensen but Aries puts Jesse's foot on the ropes. Aries then rolls up Kash and wins.

WINNER: Austin Aries via pinfall.
Boooooring. Zzzzzzzz....

Backstage, Borash talks to AJ Styles. Same old "respect" babyface promo.

No DQ: Rob Van Dam vs. Christopher Daniels
Daniels gets a mic and asks how they got to the point to having a no disqualification point (here's a hint: it's TNA, they need a no-dq match on every ppv). He suggests instead that they have a normal wrestling match instead. This results in an ECW chant. I'm so sick of that section of fans that feels the need to hold onto that. After that last match bored me half to death, this one isn't helping. The lack of updates is because you're not missing anything. The highlight so far has been that Mike Tenay referred to a Death Valley Driver that Daniels did on Rob Van Dam as "a DVD on RVD". Daniels tries to leave. He and RVD then fight outside of the ring long past a 10-count while Hebner sticks around, so I guess it's back to being a no disqualification match. Daniels throws Hebner into RVD. Then uses a chair. Out comes the screwdriver, but RVD blocks it with the chair, then uses it on him via a dropkick. RVD hits a frog splash and wins the match.

WINNER: RVD via pinfall.
Didn't enjoy this match either, overall.

Backstage, Robbie and Robbie are talking to Borash about having won the title. Robbie E boasts that they're the biggest stars on the show and he'll be the TV champ for a long time because he's jacked. Bling equals bitches, it's time to hit the club.

Crimson vs. Matt Morgan
Crimson's basically being dominated in this match. When Morgan hits his Carboon Footprint, he knocks Crimson out of the ring (which is a long enough stall so he doesn't get the pinfall victory). Punch for punch between the two breaks down with them knocking the ref down. Double disqualification.

WINNER: Draw.
Interesting, but meh. There really wasn't much to talk about (obviously) until the ending.

After the match, they decide to keep fighting anyway, seemingly out of sportsmanship.

Backstage, Bully Ray and Steiner are with Borash. Steiner says this match will be an easy walk in the park. Steiner then claims 3x over that he knows all of Abyss's weaknesses and says his girlfriend is ugly and looks like a billy goat mixed with the toothless fans. Then adds that she's fat. Ray says they'll be in a match with one half of the greatest tag team of all time...and Scott Steiner. Steiner says "I am the greatest tag team of all time". Ray tells him to just flex. God I love Steiner promos.

Bully Ray & Scott Steiner vs. Mr. Anderson & Abyss
Anderson looks odd tonight...sick or something. Abyss looks....normal. Standard tag team match with again, nothing special to report on. If you've seen it once, you've seen it a thousand times. You know how there's the part where the heels block a successful tag from the ref's eyes, so on and so forth. Ah, here we go, Ray was just launched into the corner and shouted "holy shiiiiit", haha. The crowd's been chanting for Steiner. They cheer for the Frankensteiner. Abyss hits the Black Hole Slam on Steiner and wins the match for that team.

WINNERS: Abyss and Mr. Anderson via pinfall.
Point of no return for this pay-per-view, as once again, it was pretty much generic and not particularly interesting.

Post-match, Ray attacks them and brings out a table. They put Abyss through it, but he immediately gets back up.

Backstage, Karen Jarrett talks about how she doesn't want her Knockouts champion to be like Velvet Sky and talks trash about her. Gail on the other hand is a role model. Gail says it'll be a cake-walk. 

Knockouts Championship: Velvet Sky (c) vs. Gail Kim
Gail must be happy with her move from WWE to TNA. She comes over and gets a tag title, then a title shot, and they're calling her the best ever. Way to suck up, TNA. Granted, WWE didn't use her as well as she should have been used, but still, it's typical TNA mentality where someone new comes in, so immediately they're at the top. Gail's understandably controlling the match (as she's the more seasoned performer) and doing a good job at it. Velvet hits a facebuster, but Karen distracts the ref. Madison runs in to interfere and hits Velvet with...something (the fans chant "you fucked up", and I have no clue what she was going for). Velvet kicks out nonetheless. Gail misses a senton. Madison interferes again, holding Velvet's leg. Gail hits her finisher and wins the title.

WINNER (and new Knockouts champion): Gail Kim via pinfall.
Gail must be even happier to move over now. Decent match from the things that came before it and what I was expecting.

Backstage, Bischoff is yelling into his cell phone about birth control. Ray comes up to say he needs to do something about Abyss. He says they need to change direction. Everything's going wrong.

Jeff Jarrett vs. Jeff Hardy
Jeff Hardy comes out looking like Meta Knight from the Kirby games. Within a minute of the bell going off, Hardy hits the Twist of Fate and pins Jarrett.

WINNER: Jeff Hardy via pinfall.
Well, this was only one move, and I can only assume they did it to reference the match with Sting. If it makes this pay-per-view end any faster, I'm all for it.

They decide to have another match.

Jeff Jarrett vs. Jeff Hardy
Now Jarrett is the one in charge. Hardy fights back. Random roll-up and Hardy wins again.

WINNER: Jeff Hardy via pinfall.
Still pretty quick, so they couldn't really get into a big match for it. It was ok for what it was worth, as long as they don't cheat the fans and they have a rematch at the next ppv.

Jarrett hits Hardy with a chair after the match. He brings him into the ring and gives him a Stroke. He asks Hebner to count anyway. Hardy flips him over and Hebner counts a THIRD pinfall victory for Jeff Hardy. LMAO. I'll admit, that was funny.

Backstage, Eric Young and Crimson congratulate Hardy. Young tells him he'll give him some free t-shirts. AJ Styles shakes his hand.

Borash talks to Roode. "I was Beer Money, I was Fortune". They kept him from his full potential. He calls himself the leader of "the selfish generation" and "the it factor".

TNA Championship: Bobby Roode (c) vs. AJ Styles
I'm not expecting this to be good, considering Styles supposedly is wrestling injured, so I'll give it some leeway. I don't really see much of a hindrance on AJ's part, however. Either AJ's injury is less severe than I was led on to believe, or AJ's just that good at hiding it. If it's the latter, bravo man, cause I know I wouldn't be able to do that in the slightest. AJ is even able to jump up to the top rope and hit a nice superplex amongst doing his usual amount of flips and high-flying moves. Very solid spinebuster from Roode. AJ springboards into a 450 but Roode gets out of the way. AJ then goes for the Styles Clash, but Roode reverses into a crossface. AJ breaks out and weakly power bombs Roode. AJ then hits a springboard forearm, but only gets a 2-count. Roode gets a low blow on AJ but also inadvertently hits the ref in the nether regions as well. Styles kicks out. AJ attempts an inside cradle but is unsuccessful. Styles picks Roode up and crotches him on the ropes. Roode dodges a suicide dive, so Styles crashes outside the ring. Roode goes for a Perfect Plex, but Styles kicks out. Random Pele kick. Styles gets ready for the Styles Clash, but Roode rolls him up, grabs the tights, and retains the title.

WINNER: Bobby Roode via pinfall.
Best match of the night.

Guessing every match right (if you count the draw as both guys winning) is pretty good I'd think. Give me some of that money you got by betting on me.