Smark Out Moment

Will CM Punk leave the company with the WWE title? Will Christian make good on his promises to beat Orton despite losing every time in the past? Will Dolph Ziggler find a spot on the card like he deserves? Will Sin Cara botch a potentially awesome move and sour the rest of the match? It's time for Money in the Bank!


Smackdown Money in the Bank: Sin Cara vs. Wade Barrett vs. Justin Gabriel vs. Sheamus vs. Cody Rhodes vs. Heath Slater vs. Daniel Bryan vs. Kane
Sin Cara FINALLY has new ring gear. It's about time. Cody does too, somewhat. Sin Cara is the first of 3 people to dodge a ladder baseball slide but then they hit him anyway. I have to admit, I laughed. There's a "Sin Enough Cara" sign. I'll admit, I laughed again. Gabriel, Bryan, and Slater are launching themselves all over the place. Sheamus power bombs Sin Cara through a ladder which was set up between the apron and the table. Sin Cara sells it by twitching a lot. The paramedics are taking Sin Cara away. Kane clotheslined Bryan who was being held up by Sheamus. Bryan landed with his face on a ladder, it seems. Sheamus and Wade try to use the ladder to toss Slater, but Slater messes up and just falls to the outside onto Kane instead. Kane chokeslams Sheamus onto a ladder. Gabriel jumps off a ladder that was horizontal on the top rope and gives a 450 splash onto Kane. Daniel Bryan kicks Wade Barrett down and wins the match! Wow.

WINNER: Daniel Bryan
Honestly, a lackluster ladder match. This is probably my least favorite of the Money in the Bank matches. I'm extremely surprised that Bryan won and I'm not sure where they're going from here but I'll be keeping an eye on the situation.

Divas Championship: Kelly Kelly (c) vs. Brie Bella
Nothing to report on, of course, except that Kelly hit her finisher and won the match.

WINNER: Kelly Kelly via pinfall.
Divas match. Enough said.

Big Show vs. Mark Henry
Mark Henry is thrown into the ring steps, by which I mean he jumped over it and completely missed. Then he drop kicked the steps, which barely moved, into Big Show. After just a series of bumping into each other and punches and whatnot, Henry hits a World's Strongest Slam and Show kicks out. Henry splashes Show and wins then.

WINNER: Mark Henry via pinfall.
It's a shame, because I like both these guys and I was into this feud, but this match was just bad.

Mark Henry gets a chair post-match and puts it on Big Show's leg, then does a Vader Bomb onto it. Why is it that Big Show's storyline the past month or so has just consisted of him getting his leg injured? They take Big Show out with the paramedics.

Backstage with Vince McMahon
Josh asks Vince if he re-signed CM Punk, he says no.

Raw Money in the Bank: Alberto Del Rio vs. Kofi Kingston vs. Jack Swagger vs. Evan Bourne vs. R-Truth vs. Alex Riley vs. the Miz vs. Rey Mysterio
Before anyone else is out, Del Rio and Kingston have ladders in hand. This is how they should have done it. Swagger is bringing a ladder to the ring as well. Everyone else does. Del Rio is the target at first and once he's been attacked and thrown outside, everyone decides to throw their ladders on top of him. Bourne does Air Bourne off a ladder onto a group of them outside of the ring, which was great of course. Del Rio knocks Miz and Bourne off the ladder and Miz is holding his knee and really selling it (hopefully not for real). They're taking Miz away. Kofi hits a Boom Drop off a ladder in similar fashion to Gabriel. All 7 of them are up on a few ladders fighting each other. Del Rio gets pushed off onto a ladder. Bourne is thrown to the outside. Riley falls off. Then Trruth. Then Mysterio. Kofi's left and Swagger runs up FAST to try to knock him down.Swagger falls off VERY awkwardly. Miz comes back, hobbling to the ring and starts to climb to some cheers. Mysterio sunset flip power bombs Miz and starts climbing, to the crowd booing. Del Rio comes up and unmasks Rey, then Rey falls off the ladder as well as Del Rio! Del Rio re-climbs and wins!

WINNER: Alberto Del Rio.
This one was better. I guess they chose to screw the first one in favor of the second one.

World Heavyweight Championship: Randy Orton (c) vs. Christian
Christian brings a chair into the ring trying to goad Orton into a DQ. Christian misses a splash on the outside and is then thrown into the steps. Orton does a good reversal from the ropes into a roll-up. Christian gets a close two-count after a headbutt from the top rope. Orton kicks out of a Kill Switch. Christian spits in Orton's face.Orton almost got disqualified after a 5 count. Orton low-blows Christian and gets DQ'ed.

WINNER (and new champion): Christian via DQ.
Not as good as their other matches, but not bad.

Orton attacks Christian after the match and tackles him over the Spanish Announcer's Table. That's so being destroyed in a minute. Teddy Long comes out. Orton gives Christian an RKO on the table...but it doesn't break. Damn, there goes my prediction. Orton leaves, comes back, gives Christian another RKO and it doesn't break again. Orton's cursing up a storm, saying "stupid mother fucker" and "fucking sucks". This would have been a good time for Daniel Bryan to come out..........but it didn't happen.

WWE Championship: John Cena (c) vs. CM Punk
Since this is starting at 10 o'clock, I'd assume that either Cena gets an automatic rematch or Del Rio cashes in.
 The crowd obviously is pro-Punk. The boos for Cena are so good. Cena doesn't come out all energized - there'd be no point. There starts the "you can't wrestle" chants. Punk asks the crowd who they're chanting, him (boos) or Cena (cheers) and then he nods "ok". The match seems to consist of Punk telling Cena wrestling moves to do. CM Punk does a crossbody on to Cena and it just comes out TERRIBLE. There have been a few botches in this match and Cena just looks so out of it. I don't know if they're doing this on purpose to play up the "can't wrestle" stuff, but if not, then goddamn Cena. Double clothesline time. Punk messes up landing on his feet from an Attitude Adjustment. Cena gets blasted in the face with Punk's knee when he's on the ropes. Maybe Punk's pissed at how bad the match has gone. Punk gets out of the STF. Cena reverses the GTS into a second STF attempt. Punk reverses into the Anaconda Vice. Cena hits the AA and Punk kicks out. They mess up the move where Cena goes for the top rope leg drop and Punk power bombs him instead. Last time that was messed up, Cena was injured. Punk kicks out of another Attitude Adjustment. Punk hits a GTS and Cena falls to the outside. McMahon comes down with Johnny Ace and they try to do a Chicago Screwjob. Cena hits Ace, then says he'll win the right way. Punk hits the GTS and gets the win!!!

WINNER (and new WWE champion): CM Punk via pinfall. 
The last half of the match was great, and of course the whole angle is red hot. It doesn't excuse the botches, but ok. I previously had this worded as being 2/3 terrible, but apparently some people are so hurt about that and misconstrued it as me saying it was some real piece of trash. Poor choice of words on my part, I'll admit it, so I'll word it more clearly. I do NOT think that this was Match of the Year in terms of match quality. In terms of atmosphere it certainly is up there, but atmosphere does not make a good match by default, and I think Orton vs Christian at Over the Limit is a far superior match, similar to how last year, I thought Ziggler vs Bryan was a better match than HBK vs Undertaker. Taker vs HBK had a better atmosphere, but I enjoyed Ziggler vs Bryan more. So yeah, subpar for part of this match, ok for part, absolutely awesome for the ending. 

Post-match, McMahon gets on the headset and asks for Del Rio to cash in the briefcase. Del Rio comes down and Punk immediately plants him with a kick. Punk goes through the crowd.