Smark Out Moment

What's gone on this past week in wrestling?

• Linda's considering running for office again. I think I speak for every wrestling fan when I say I hope she doesn't.
• A high school kid, after losing a wrestling match, hit his opponent with a chair. Response #1) WTF?, response #2) fucking awesome!, response #3) what a sore loser, response #4) it probably still is better to watch than TNA.
• So apparently the Chaperone did so poorly at the box office that it didn't even make $1,700. On average, movie tickets tend to be about 10 dollars a piece, which means less than 200 people saw it. OUCH. Is anyone surprised, cause I sure as hell am not. Look at the trailer. 1700 seems like too much.
• WWE rehired Scott Armstrong. Why did they fire him in the first place? Second, it's kind of odd that immediately after rehiring him, they put him as the ref in the Elimination Chamber main event. Quite a promotion.
• Trish Stratus is a trainer on Tough Enough. I hope she doesn't cut any more promos like she did at Elimination Chamber. If she goes out there and just looks hot, then I'm all for it.
• Bill DeMott is going to be a trainer for Tough Enough as well. Meh. I would have much rather had William Regal take that spot.
• Some CZW guy was trying to claim that he was connected to the 2-21-11 videos. Really? If WWE doesn't want to raid the talent pool of TNA or ROH, they sure as hell don't want to stick their hands into CZW - especially not with this PG environment, considering how CZW brands itself on being essentially a more chaotic ECW. 
• Hacksaw will be in the Hall of Fame. Worthy of the spot in my opinion, when you look at the older guys left. Others rumored to be in the mix are the Legion of Doom, Sunny, Abdullah the Butcher, and Bullet Bob Armstrong. Honestly...I was hoping for two bigger names than Butcher and Armstrong. LOD, Sunny, and HBK are strong choices, and I guess the best way to put the Hacksaw nod would be that it follows his career as a solid midcarder from the old times, but Armstrong and Abdullah aren't going to get any kind of mainstream feel to them. I was hoping that the previous idea of Luger, Simmons, and Arn Anderson would have been replacements for those. Still, it's just a rumor until they announce them for sure. 
• Back to back, Jillian Hall announced that she's pregnant, and Candice Michelle announced that she had a miscarriage. Congrats on one, a shame for the other. 
• Al Snow was quoted to say that the term "smart mark" is an oxymoron. While I agree with him on his comment that fans that aren't directly involved in the business AREN'T total authorities on the subject as if they were sitting in on production meetings, I disagree when people act like the idea of fans knowing it's a work and hearing backstage information is something abhorrent. If you can watch behind-the-scenes footage for films and comment on the writing, acting, direction, etc, why can't you do it for wrestling...especially when they so often try to pass themselves off as being not just a sport, but entertainment? Fair's fair. If it's not a sin for people to know that a TV sitcom is fake but be willing to suspend disbelief despite watching the actors talk out of character on talk shows and such, it's the same for wrestling.
• They supposedly haven't decided on an announce team for WrestleMania, as it is complicated by the Cole/Lawler feud. I sincerely hope they go with Jim Ross, or at the very least, the trio of Mathews, Striker, and Cole. They can't give Booker one of only 3 spots, if they want the ppv to come off decent. He's just too bad right now.
• Marijuana use in the WWE is down. In my opinion, good. I know that's an unpopular opinion to have...spare me the circular argument lol.
• WWE clearly has big plans for Mistico if they're going to be rushing him through FCW and they've announced his signing as a huge deal. That could mean one of two things: he gets a roster spot very quickly and they put a lot of focus on him and he succeeds, or he gets a roster spot very quickly, they put too much focus on him, and he flops and they go crazy.
• TNA does a rainy video of someone's boots that ends with 3-3-11 as a shot at WWE's 2-21-11...they really need to stop piggybacking off WWE. That's the type of stuff WCW would do that got them nowhere, like the Oklahoma character. If you constantly set out to remind the audience of the competition, they're more aware of the competition! WWE's doing it right by not acknowledging TNA at all when they do those things. Why give them free publicity? Is that what TNA is doing, trying to get WWE to respond by saying TNA and thus, giving them exposure to the WWE crowd that isn't aware they exist? I doubt it'll work. Oh, and didn't Dixie hype this up by using her go-to phrase of "shocker of the year" or "will change the face of wrestling forever" or whatever? Good lord, if she ran a restaurant, every single burger would be "the burger that defies all logic and is the best of all time, ever". Damn near every week, TNA tries to tell you something that will inevitably fail is going to be the biggest thing in the world and when it comes and it sucks, you want to bash your head against the wall for how stupid it was. WWE does the opposite...they do something right, and then just sickeningly remind you of it until you want to bash your head against a wall from being so tired of hearing about it. Dixie won't shut up about something she's yet to do and builds it up to subsequently fall - Vince does something, then won't shut up about it until you no longer care about the accolade (ie Longest Running Weekly Episodic AAHHH STFU) 
• So why do they feel the need to keep firing and rehiring people on Smackdown? Nobody ever really expects them to be real.

I had a chance to talk with Chris Jericho about his new book, Undisputed: How to Become the World Champion in 1,372 Easy Steps. You can read my review here and listen to the interview down below.

*NOTE: If for some reason it isn't working, please alert me and I'll fix it.



Thanks again to Chris for taking time out of his busy schedule to talk!

For more information, visit www.chrisjericho.com, www.fozzyrock.com, or you can catch Y2J's tweets @IAMJERICHO

The third elimination of NXT season 4 is...Derrick Bateman.

My take on the situation? Not a fan. I really think that Bateman was the highlight of the season and not only does he have a ton of potential, but he also would have worked well challenging for the tag titles with Bryan.  I'd put him on Smackdown right after this season is over, if I were in charge.

I've expected Johnny Curtis to get eliminated for 2 weeks now, so I definitely can't see him winning over Brodus Clay. However, Kaval needed the win more than Alex Riley, and Brodus seems to be fine without the win, so they might give it to Curtis just so he and Truth can challenge for the tag titles and make Curtis seem on par with Brodus.

WWE management has long been worried that this year's WrestleMania will not be able to deliver in buy rates and when you look at the card lined up, yes, there are noticeable gaps. The youth movement has moved from infancy to toddlerhood, as evidenced by the Miz and Del Rio (though he's not exactly in his early 20s) but is still not in full swing. The old guard is changing and we already are missing the one guaranteed classic match that we get every year: "the HBK match". With the Money in the Bank being gone as well, this is definitely a trying year, and I wouldn't be surprised if it was written off in the history books as something in comparison to WrestleMania 11, but that's not to say that it doesn't still have the potential to deliver as well. Good ideas can turn out bad, bad ideas can turn out good. Look at Bret Hart vs Vince McMahon from last year. That was horrendous. So what's in store for this year?

In the years past, they adopted some themes. For instance, WrestleMania 23 had the theme of "All Grown Up". This year it seems like the focus is all on escorts. Seriously, count how many extraneous non-wrestling entities are popping up. The primary focus is on the Rock who is supposed to be nothing but a host. The feud also involves Alex Riley (though not to a big extent). The world title match includes both Brodus Clay and Christian. The Corre's angle is built entirely on people that aren't the legal man helping out in a match. The Cody/Rey match threw Dusty in there. Lawler and Cole aren't roster members and they've added Austin (and for one show, JBL and Brian Christopher) into that feud, alongside Jack Swagger. The Nexus angle was predominantly focused on "which guys that aren't in the match can stand beside Punk" and it now included Orton's wife. Then we've got Vickie and Trish and Snooki all involved in that mess of a match. Also, HBK involved in the HHH/Taker match. The whole build this year has revolved around people that aren't in the match itself doing most (or all) of the leg work.



WWE Championship: The Miz (c) vs. John Cena
It's a shame that this feud has become John Cena vs the Rock guest starring the Miz, instead of the Rock being on the sideline. Obviously, if they were able to do an actual match between Rock/Cena, then naturally that would raise more dough than Miz/Cena, but they're setting themselves up for a huge drop. People are going to be expecting something big with the Rock and I don't think you'll see it. At the most, the Rock will hit a Rock Bottom and People's Elbow on the Miz, I'm guessing, and are you really going to be satisfied with that? WWE should be careful. Building something up and getting ppv buyrates is one thing, but if you're setting yourself up for an even bigger fall, then the fallout is going to be huge as well - especially if in the process, you give the title to the guy who is coming out of this looking like a tweener (and not in the cool way), John Cena. The babyface here is the Rock. The Miz should be the heel, facing the babyface Cena, but he's being overshadowed, and instead, looking like the incompetent bit-player that shouldn't be in the same league as those two (which is a shame considering how great the Miz has been doing). Winning the tag titles did nothing for the feud and people won't even remember that by the time the match comes around. All I'm saying is if you go into this expecting a classic, you're going to be disappointed.

PREDICTION: John Cena wins the title.


World Heavyweight Championship: Edge (c) vs. Alberto Del Rio
We've known about this match for some time now. The only real question now is whether or not Del Rio will win the title. At the moment, I'm leaning more towards no, he won't. The poll on the side of Smark Out Moment at the moment goes back and forth all the time. It's not out of the realm of possibility, though, especially if they book it pretty much in the midcard of the ppv like they've done in the past. It definitely won't be the main event of the night as that will go to either Cena/Miz or Taker/HHH. Now that they're having Brodus Clay and Christian take part in this feud (which is a good idea in my opinion) I expect both of them to get involved somehow in this match. I would not be surprised in the slightest to see Brodus interfere, Christian stop him, and then Rodriguez cause a distraction that costs Edge the title. Either Edge drops it here or he drops it at Extreme Rules, but Del Rio is going to be the champ soon enough, and it all depends on whether or not they want him to win it at the big event. I have a feeling whatever I say, they're going to do the opposite (not conditionally but just out of pure dumb luck escaping me).

PREDICTION: Edge retains, then potentially drops it at Extreme Rules, but it's a crap shoot.


Undertaker vs. Triple H
If you look at my post on what I would have booked for WrestleMania, you'll see that this match is on it, despite how I don't particularly want to actually see it. I don't think either of these guys are healthy enough to put on a fantastic match, nor do I think HHH would be able to do that anyway since his in-ring ability has slowed down considerably over the years and he was never HBK to begin with. It isn't all HHH's fault in my predetermination, as I think Taker won't have it in him physically to carry the match. I love the guy but you can see that his body can't handle a whole lot more. Hell, you can tell they've kept the two of them off wrestling other people just to make sure nothing goes awry. This feud got stale for me very soon, considering how it was nothing but the same exact promo being repeated between the two for weeks. As always, they can prove me wrong, but I don't see it happening - even if I can completely foresee people bitching on my comments that they loved it and that I'm wrong. I hope to hell they have a good/great match, but there's no way it'll top HBK vs Taker from WM 25. Absolutely no way.

PREDICTION: Obviously, Undertaker wins...or I stop watching WWE.


Randy Orton vs. CM Punk
What a shame. This could have been the top feud of the card for a WrestleMania main event and they squandered the fuck out of it to a ridiculous point. This has become an afterthought feud when it really could have been a headliner. Orton punting Nexus members and that's it. Ugh. What a fucking shame. The match should be good if they give the guys a decent amount of time, but I can't help but feel like they'll screw them over and use some of that time to blast us with another Chaperone trailer.

PREDICTION: CM Punk squeaks out a victory, which will be handed back to him at Extreme Rules.


Jerry Lawler vs. Michael Cole
Poor Jack Swagger, relegated to being in the corner of a commentator instead of having a match for himself. At least it gets him on the card and he's doing something more than just being yelled at backstage by the Rock or something. He'll definitely try to interfere and end up getting a stunner as a result of it. I like the angle between Cole and Lawler, but I'm hoping the match lasts no longer than 5 minutes. They don't need any longer than that to give you everything you want. Any longer and you run the risk of exposing all of the flaws. Cole is not a trained wrestler. We don't need another fiasco like Hart/McMahon from last year. Austin is now the special guest ref. I don't know why. I doubt his involvement is going to make thousands of people buy the ppv. Plus, you know the most he'll contribute to the match is what he's been doing for years: stun someone, drink beer, waste a ton of time circling the ring, and leave. Honestly, I'd trade 100 Austin appearances for just one of them where he does something other than that. It's gotten more than repetitive and I actually was disappointed that JBL wasn't the ref instead. I fast-forwarded through Austin's nonsense. They've done some good things in this feud to give it more heat than what it would normally have, like bringing Brian Christopher out for a segment. I'm curious where they'll go after this feud is over with, but I like it. 

PREDICTION: Lawler of course comes out on top after Austin stuns Swagger.


Cody Rhodes vs. Rey Mysterio
I'm all for Rey working with Cody. I don't even think the concept behind the feud is that bad. But what I'm not a fan of is how this WrestleMania is filled with matches that will not be given enough time (like last year) and won't mean anything in the long run. This falls into that category. This will be around 6 minutes long, very rushed, and nobody will remember it by the end of the night.

PREDICTION: Rey Mysterio SHOULD lose...but he probably won't.


John Morrison, Trish Stratus, & Snooki vs. Dolph Ziggler and LayCool
I didn't like the idea of this match when it had Kelly in it...I'm sure as hell not going to like it when it has Snooki instead. The whole concept behind the match just doesn't do it for me, and you know that the in-ring performance will be terrible (outside of John and Dolph). It's really a shame that Morrison and Ziggler, who have just been so awesome as of late, are being thrown into a match like this. I hope WWE rewards them after Mania with world title reigns.

PREDICTION: There's no way they'll have Trish and Snooki in a match and not have them come out on top. I just hope that the entire match is Ziggler/Morrison until the finish lol.


United States Championship: Sheamus (c) vs. Daniel Bryan
I still think a much better match would be Bryan against Swagger, and I don't really have a lot of faith that this will be particularly good. The feud itself is rushed and lackluster and I can't see anything good spawning out of this, as more than likely, it will just end with Sheamus retaining and then being lost in the shuffle, though not as lost as Daniel Bryan.

PREDICTION: Sheamus retains and the match isn't given a lot of time to develop into anything good, but everyone will forget about it.

The Corre vs. Big Show, Kane, Santino Marella, & Vladimir Kozlov
WWE methodology: take the biggest angle in the company and when it comes to WrestleMania season, split the group up into two factions that then both get shoved into the midcard. Then, eliminate one of them completely off the card by having them all get punted in the head. Throw the others into a random half-assed tag match with Santino and Kozlov. But oh shit, we have to do something here to make it seem worthwhile. Uh...let's give Barrett the IC strap and let's put the tag titles on them! Phew, now we don't have to worry about them defending those titles. Oh, you mean to tell me the IC champ isn't looking for revenge in this match and has nothing going for him for WrestleMania? Meh, Kofi Kingston is only one of the guys we'll depend on for the future, along with Drew McIntyre...they can sit out this one. Snooki's more important.

PREDICTION: The Corre wins. Guess who they pin.

We may be in for a bumpy ride...but I hope they pull off a miracle and don't leave us in the dust.

The Roadblock to WrestleMania's 16 tons of steel can mean only one thing: ELIMINATION CHAMBER time!

Alberto Del Rio vs. Kofi Kingston
Alberto gets on the mic and says people from Oakland are low-class and Kofi is a piece of trash. The match is worked so far in a way that lets you know that Del Rio is the one to watch, even though it isn't quite a squash. Good spot occurs when Del Rio counters the crossbody by putting his knees up. Awesome reversal into a DDT from Kofi, and the ref is distracted by Ricardo Rodriguez, preventing Kofi from getting the win. Kofi hits the SOS and Alberto kicks out. Alberto struggles to lock in the cross armbreaker, but once he gets it in, Kofi taps.

WINNER: Alberto Del Rio via submission.
For an opener, not bad, but it was basically nothing above the match you saw on Smackdown.

Backstage with Edge
Todd puts over Del Rio and asks Edge to run over what's going on with the title. He points out that nobody has walked out the chamber the champ if they went in, but he's just the guy to do it. McIntyre interrupts and blames Edge for Kelly's firing.

World Heavyweight Championship [Elimination Chamber]: Edge (c) vs. Kane vs. Wade Barrett vs. Drew McIntyre vs. Rey Mysterio vs. Big Show
Everyone I was watching this ppv with were upset that Christian wasn't the filler spot. I'm just annoyed that Mysterio's in the match and starting it off, because that means he'll be in it quite long. At least he's starting off with Edge. McIntyre's banging on the chamber pod. I guess he doesn't realize he has at least a few minutes left to wait. Wade Barrett is the next out. Edge nails Mysterio with a kick before he can hit a 619 (though of course, you know we'll see it soon enough). The next out is Kane. All 3 others kick Kane in the head and pin him one after another, and he kicks out each time. McIntyre comes out next and immediately throws Mysterio into the glass. McIntyre then kicks the ropes to low-blow Barrett, then throws Barrett through another pod. The audience is loving it. Mysterio gets thrown into the glass again by Kane (in a way that might not have been planned). Big Show comes out and cleans house. Show pushes Wade into a pod and then gives him a series of slaps to the chest. Wade Barrett gets pinned by Big Show and is the first eliminated. Mysterio starts climbing the pod. He hits a West Coast Pop on Big Show, but Show kicks out. He then hits the 619 on him and Show gets speared by Edge. Kane chokeslams Show and eliminates him. Kane then eliminates McIntyre. Edge spears Kane and eliminates him. Back to the first two people. Kane then decides to attack them despite being eliminated. Edge catches Rey before the 619 and puts him in a modified sharpshooter. Edge hits the spear. Two-count. Mysterio hits the 619. Two-count. Edge hits the spear while Rey jumps off the top rope. Rey Mysterio is eliminated.

WINNER: Edge via pinfall.
Not bad. Not the best chamber match, but not bad. Everyone had a chance to look strong, which was good. McIntyre especially came out of it looking better.

Del Rio comes out to attack Edge. Christian makes the save.

Backstage with Lawler
Striker's been demoted to backstage interviews while Booker contributes nothing to commentary. Ouch. Lawler's talking in his serious voice. He runs down the usual stuff.

Booker T in the Ring
For some reason, Booker was brought to the ring. He announces that Trish Stratus is going to be a trainer on Tough Enough. Trish comes out and still looks hot.

Tag Team Championship: Santino Marella & Vladimir Kozlov (c) vs. Justin Gabriel & Heath Slater
Slater twists into the ring and Kozlov puts up his knee, but they no-sell it. That's odd. Cobra to Gabriel. I guess that means they lose the tag titles. Slater hits a reverse DDT onto Kozlov and Gabriel follows it up with a 450 and the pin.

WINNERS (and new tag team champions): Justin Gabriel & Heath Slater via pinfall.
I guess we're looking at the Corre and Nexus including the tag titles at WrestleMania. Big fan of that. Not a bad match for Raw and such, but for a ppv it could have been better.

Backstage with the Miz
Grisham asks Miz how nervous he is. You know how these things go. He says he'll win and such.

Vickie Guerrero to the Ring
Vickie says Dolph has an uncontrollable anger problem and that the attack on Teddy was a crime of passion. She pleads for the WWE Universe to petition for Dolph's rehiring. Teddy comes out and tells her to shut up. He says he's in a hiring mood, but not for Ziggler. Instead, he's rehired Kelly. Kelly attacks Vickie and LayCool makes the save. Trish comes out to make the save for Kelly.

WWE Championship: The Miz (c) vs. Jerry Lawler
The Miz retains. Wait, I'm getting ahead of myself. We'll get back to that in a few minutes. Lawler gets a few quick two-counts. Lawler kind of botches a superplex into a Jackhammer. Riley trips Lawler and Chioda sends him out. Lawler throws Miz into Cole. Jerry's in control. Strap's down. Lawler hits the punch from the top rope and Miz gets his foot on the ropes. I have absolutely no idea what Booker was just saying but I think he just mentioned Snoop Dogg. The Miz hits the SCF and we're back to square one, with Miz retaining.

WINNER: The Miz via pinfall.
I wish they'd have had the Miz look better than they did. He's really being booked like a transitional champ, and it's a shame. But credit where credit is due, Lawler, despite his age, had a pretty good match with Miz.

Backstage with John Cena
..who is eating a bowl of Fruity Pebbles.

Backstage with CM Punk
Punk touts his 3-0 streak against Cena.

Raw Elimination Chamber: John Cena vs. CM Punk vs. John Morrison vs. Sheamus vs. Randy Orton vs. R-Truth
Starting it off are Sheamus and John Morrison. The crowd starts the pro/anti Cena chant war. Orton comes out. Orton throws Morrison (very casually) through the glass of a pod. Orton gives Sheamus his DDT off the rope, but onto the steel grate on the outside. Punk is the next entrant, but is stuck. Orton starts hitting him anyway. Almost immediately after entering the ring, Orton RKOs him and pins him. CM Punk is eliminated already. Wow. Wait a second, the Raw GM noise sounds off. Due to a malfunctioning pod, the Raw GM is negating the elimination, and Punk's elimination is void. LMAO Punk goes back into the pod and sits down. John Cena is the next entrant, but before he can leave the pod, he's attacked by Sheamus. Where's the Raw GM? R-Truth comes out and Sheamus tries to attack him the same way he did for Cena, but it doesn't work. Sheamus kicks R-Truth. R-Truth is eliminated. Orton casually throws Morrison through the glass, again. Slugfest is pro-Orton and anti-Cena. Punk's number is up, and Orton waits for him. Cena goes for the AA but Orton RKOs him on the steel instead. Sheamus then nails Orton with a kick and Punk goes for a cover, but it's a two-count. Punk does Orton's taunt and hits the GTS, then eliminates Orton. Morrison climbs up on top of a pod and Sheamus knocks him on his back. He sets Morrison up for the High Cross from the pod, but JoMo knocks him down. Morrison stands back up and starts climbing towards the center of the dome. He jumps down onto Sheamus and eliminates him. Scott Armstrong counts very lightly on the outside and even Booker points out that he didn't want to hurt his hand. Morrison goes for his knee to the face, but misses and hits the pod instead and acts like he's hurt (kayfabe). Cena picks Punk up for an electric chair and Morrison hits a clothesline from the top rope onto him. Punk slingshots Cena into the glass (which doesn't break). He then slingshots Morrison, but John catches onto the pod, jumps off onto the chains, and hits the Flying Chuck. He then misses Starshp Pain. Punk follows it up with a GTS and eliminates Morrison. Very quickly afterward, Cena pops up and hits the AA on Punk, and eliminates him to win the match.

WINNER: John Cena via pinfall.
Some surprises here and there, some good stuff with Morrison (no surprises for that; we all knew he'd do some cool things), predictable outcome but that was implied from day one. Not bad.

Now, it's time to get ready for WrestleMania...

What's gone on this past week in wrestling?

• The WWE Hall of Fame isn't going to be the night before WrestleMania, but instead, the night afterward. I'm not a big fan of this. It'll make the HOF segment of Mania look awkward I think. Plus, if they were to go ahead and do Taker vs HHH with HBK as the special guest ref, then whatever comments he makes on the HOF speech could potentially look weird.  Plus, that brings me to another point:
• Tough Enough is going to be all over the fucking place. It'll air before Raw, after Raw, and before the Sunday morning Raw. Overkill? Plus, this TOTALLY kills the 3-hour Raw episodes from the future, which is a shame.
• Sean Waltman posted on Twitter that Justin Credible was missing. He later retracted the statement, because apparently it wasn't true. Not really much to say about that.
• Jeff Hardy is the new TNA champion. You can read my review of Against All Odds here.
• Elijah Burke talked about how TNA promotes him much better than WWE did. Can't argue with him there....even if the Pope character is just a cheap knockoff of the Rock. Still, he won no titles in WWE, and I don't see any championships yet in TNA either. 
• Jerry Lawler's mom, Hazel, apparently passed away. Sorry to hear that. I hope they don't try to work it into the Cole feud as that'd be disrespectful.
• That little girl from The Chaperone dropped all the candy in the Khali Kiss Cam segment. LMAO. 
• The Rock is the host of WrestleMania. Can't say anything but positive about that. Great choice, great idea in the first place, very cool that they brought up the Cena heat. Awesome indeed. I'm looking forward to it. 
• Michelle McCool has a leg injury. That's a shame, especially considering how without her, they pretty much have no women heels. Sure, they have Layla (who plays second-fiddle jobber), Alicia (who has done nothing lately), Maryse (likewise), Melina (likewise), and the God awful Bella twins (who are better off doing nothing, except me perhaps), but Michelle's really the backbone. Time to bring Kong in. What are they waiting for?
• Bad reviews for The Chaperone? Dude! No way!!! I smelled Oscar.
• Porn star Allie Haze was apparently on the Khali Kiss Cam. I suggest Khali looks up Jenna Haze instead.
• Del Rio is apparently not a huge fan of Mistico being signed, as it means that he'll have competition for the top Hispanic superstar spot once Mysterio retires, which could happen at any time considering his age and injury level. 
• Alicia Fox's sister, Caylee, may have been released from FCW. Never saw her in a match. Didn't hear anything great, nor horrible. Guess that's not a real loss, then, but more like lateral motion.
• Kevin Dunn souring on Sheamus = Sheamus not being pushed? Frankly, I think it would be them realizing that they pushed him too far, too fast, and that only now is he starting to show that he can be in the main event, but he's a 2-time WWE champ already. Think about it...that's half as many world titles as HBK.....Sheamus. 
• Rumors of World Champion Edge vs. Intercontinental Champion Alberto Del Rio at WrestleMania? Let's just say, if we see the Kofi/Del Rio match change to a title bout, then it will happen. I'm all for it, too. I don't think Del Rio is ready for the world title, and if he loses at WrestleMania but then still has the IC title to fall back on, then that works. I'd rather see Edge lose it to Wade Barrett.
• Dolph Ziggler was world champion for what, 20 minutes? Good for him to be a former world champ, but it's a shame they couldn't let him keep it and drop it at the Elimination Chamber. After having been "fired", talked a bit about it, referencing old gimmicks like the golf caddy he portrayed and his time in the Spirit Squad. He also threw in some "I'm going to TNA" jokes. Ziggler's just been on a roll for months and I'm glad they're awarding him for his efforts. If they do a Money in the Bank at WrestleMania, he's definitely someone to watch out for.

Another month, another pay-per-view. The stage is set with the split between Fortune and Immortal. Which side will emerge dominant and which side will be going up against all odds? Yes! I got a pun in!


Alrighty, here we go. Pretty lively crowd tonight. That's good.

Tenay says that travel problems have prevented Generation Me from being able to show. Well there goes 2/3 of that planned match.

X-Division #1 Contender Match: Robbie E vs. Generation Me
Robbie comes out and says since Generation Me can't make it, he wins by forfeit. The ref starts the match, counts to 10, and he wins by default.

WINNER: Robbie E via forfeit.
Well, I can't really criticize them for something out of their control.

Kazarian comes out and says that's a cheap win, Cookie's cheap and a filthy garden gnome, and Robbie is now in a match with Kazarian.

X-Division Championship: Kazarian (c) vs. Robbie E
Funny how in wrestling (both TNA and WWE) you can have Fortune doing despicable things, then one week they turn babyface, and suddenly they have morals. Only in wrestling could you get away with that stuff. Gotta love it. Even though I think the Fortune turn seems a bit premature, it appears as though the crowd is eating it up, cause Kazarian is getting a good reaction. The match is kind of dominated by Kazarian and ends with him hitting that reverse tombstone piledriver for the win.

WINNER: Kazarian via pinfall.
For an impromptu match, it wasn't bad.

Backstage with Steiner & Beer Money
Steiner says......uh......I have no fucking idea. Something about farting out shoelaces. You know how Steiner is with his promos. Beer Money run down how they'll win and so forth.

AJ comes out and joins commentary.

Six Man Tag Match: Rob Terry, Murphy, & Gunner vs. Beer Money & Scott Steiner
Here comes Scott Steiner. Get ready for some b-t-b suplexes. I've counted two already. Terry and Scott have a pose-off which ends with the ref distracted and Steiner low-blowing Terry. I could have sworn the ref counted to 4 and then claimed that Storm kicked out from under Terry. Steiner wins the match for his team with a top-rope Frankensteiner.

WINNERS: Scott Steiner & Beer Money via pinfall.
Meh, kind of generic. Roode had a good performance and made the match.

Backstage with Devon
Devon says his boys won't be in the match because he doesn't want them to be sacrificial lambs.

Samoa Joe vs. The Pope D'angelo Dinero
I don't get why they continually make Joe out to be a big deal, but then they never give him anything worthwhile to do. Shouldn't he be one of the forefront anti-Immortal people if they really gave a shit, instead of Crimson? Pope keeps stalling and decides to leave before Kato stops him. I think the idea of copying a Green Hornet character is really stupid...like RoboCop in WCW stupid. I'm not really enjoying this match. The slow pace and everything is sapping a lot of my energy and making it hard for me to pay attention. Joe gets the choke hold in and there you go.

WINNER: Samoa Joe via submission.
Not a fan of it.

Dinero attacks Joe after the match, including throwing him into the exposed turnbuckle. Time to blade.

Backstage with Mickie James
Mickie stumbles over her promo. She looks great though.

Knockouts Championship [Last Knockout Standing Match]: Madison Rayne (c) vs. Mickie James
However, Madison looks hotter. I just noticed a sign in the crowd that says "I'll pay Flair's bar tab". Nice one. Note to Taz, female dogs aren't "dogettes", they're "bitches". I can't figure out which one of them is causing it, but the match looks a little sloppy. It looks like it's a little more Mickie's fault than Madison's, but they're not clicking really well, as if they're tired or something. Speaking of which, there's an "epic fail" sign someone is holding up. Now they're both under the ring, maybe for a breather. They both slowly (and I mean slowly) crawl out, and then Madison awkwardly hits the steps. Mickie then is pushed off the top rope and awkwardly falls onto the apron. They're really off tonight. Mickie then only has one foot up on the 10th count, but the ref says that's ok. Mickie then misses a top-rope Thesz press. Then botches a kick to Rayne. Mickie takes Madison's glove and Taz brings up the man-hands episode of Seinfeld. I'd rather be watching that right now. Tara comes down and interferes. Through the process, Madison pulls out brass knucks and hits Mickie. Then, Madison goes for a pinfall, despite how it isn't that type of match. She wins anyway.

WINNER: Madison Rayne via KO, despite how she wanted it to be a pin.
Easily the worst match so far. Not good at all. That was Bella twins bad.

Jeff Hardy cuts a shitty promo about how he's going to "beat an asshole's ass" while he's applying face makeup, getting ready for his appearance in a Tim Burton film I guess.

Matt Morgan comes out, says he was going to talk but he's calling out Hernandez instead. He tells Hernandez that he "betters talk". Remember that stuttering gimmick? Hernandez says he's loved in Mexico and treated like the star he really is, but in America, he's treated like a second class citizen. Hernandez tells Morgan to look around and see that he's in the minority. Meanwhile, if you look into the crowd, you see a bevy of white faces. Apparently this whole angle is "you're a punk ass white boy and Hispanics are better". I've never been a big fan of angles like this in wrestling because it splits the audience on something that isn't a good/evil scenario. Hernandez shouldn't be a heel for being Hispanic, he should be a heel for being a douche. But I'm sure it'll be over in no time and nobody will remember it in a few months anyway, so who cares?

Backstage with Matt Hardy
Hardy starts to explain the Cold Blood nickname. He's always been the good guy, enough's enough, etc. Some other bullshit about how he's great. He probably badmouthed the internet too but I sort of zoned out, like I always tend to do with Matt Hardy promos.

RVD vs. Matt Hardy
At least Hardy stepped up his in-ring gear and no longer wears that stupid pair of tights with the key on it that he did in WWE. Did Van Dam just hit a crowd member when he put Hardy on the security barricade? I think he just positioned Hardy so his legs clocked the guy in the face. If so, it sucks to be that guy. Frog splash ends the match for RVD.

WINNER: RVD via pinfall.
I've said before that I'm not a fan of RVD or Matt Hardy, so I suppose if you like them, you'd like the match, but I don't enjoy their styles, so I didn't. Plus, after the Knockouts match, the Morgan/Hernandez promo, and the Hardy promo, I was hoping for something better to wake me up. This is pretty much a situation of "to each his own" I guess.

Backstage with Bully Ray
Lol Bully Ray, such a stupid name. Ray says he likes making women cry. He also licks her hair.

Street Fight: Bully Ray vs. Devon
Ray starts off by walking off to the side to try to jump Devon. Didn't they just do that recently? At least it didn't work this time. The theme of the match seems to be "what items from the crowd can Devon use against Ray?" with the favorite going to cups of soda. I've never understood why there are kendo sticks under wrestling rings all the time. Trash cans, chairs, tables, ladders, etc you can make a case for, but it's so weird when they go under the ring and there are Singapore canes and stop signs and such. Again...only in pro wrestling. Out come Devon's kids, who basically distract Devon so Ray can hit him in the back with a chair. And now we've got the handicap match going on as Devon's kids start helping Devon out. Here come the tables. Ray then handcuffs Devon to the turnbuckle. Ray then turns his attention to Devon's kids and pins one of them to win the match.

WINNER: Bully Ray via pinfall.
I commend them for not going with a heel turn for the kids.

Post-match, Devon begs for Ray not to hurt his kids. Ray subsequently power bombs one of them through a table. Nice. The whole medical help segment following is taking up a TON of ppv time.

Backstage with Jeff Jarrett & Karen
From one storyline about kids to another. Why do they have two going at the same time?

Jeff Jarrett vs. Kurt Angle
You know how these sort of matches go. There's really nothing out of the norm to talk about. They even had the obligatory slap from Karen, as well as Karen distracting the ref so he wouldn't count Angle's pinfall, followed up with a low-blow from Jarrett, the Stroke, and a kick out. The cliches continue with the ref being knocked down. Karen's interrupted about 8 times so far, yet the ref doesn't throw her out. She's done it where he can see it, so why not? I hate when that happens. It's completely unrealistic. Jarrett then wins with a reversal pin.

WINNER: Jeff Jarrett via pinfall.
Crowd seemed to love it. I didn't. Sorry. This may be another case where I didn't enjoy the previous segments and this wasn't good enough to drag it out of the mud.

They're killing a lot of time after the match. Angle takes his boots off and just stands there, as Jeff and Karen stand on the ramp. I guess they decided with Gen Me out, they'd replace that match with the Robbie/Kazarian match, then ignore the Kazarian/mystery opponent match, and then afterward decided they'd rather waste a lot of time instead of having another impromptu match. That sucks.

Backstage with Mr. Anderson
Anderson does his Jesse Ventura impression. Blah blah blah.

TNA Championship [Ladder Match]: Mr. Anderson (c) vs. Jeff Hardy
I hope Anderson retains the title here. Sorry for not updating much, but trust me, you wouldn't want a move-by-move list, and there haven't been any particularly important things to talk about. You've got your normal ladder spots and the back-and-forth action and so forth, but as with all ladder matches, it won't get heated until the last few minutes. Good sunset flip power bomb off the ladder from Jeff. Jeff misses a leg drop from the top of the ladder. Good Green Bay Plunge from Anderson onto the ladder. Anderson tries to give him a Mic Check from the ladder, but they both fall. Jeff then climbs back up and grabs the belt.

WINNER (and new TNA champion): Jeff Hardy.
I assume they were hoping that Jeff would grab the belt on the way down from the mic check, but that didn't pan out. Still, either way, I'm not a big fan of them giving the title back to Hardy that fast. It seems kind of counter productive to have given it to Anderson in the first place if they cancel it out that quickly.

Note: For a long time now, I've been trying to figure out a way to include this segment as a video portion of the website, but various technical problems have postponed that for months on end. Frankly, I grew tired of it, so until I can figure out how to accomplish this goal with the level of professionalism that I seek, it'll be just a text version.

So here's the first edition of SATURDAY SMACK TALK: a segment wherein I take the little bits and pieces of wrestling news that have accumulated over the week and give my two cents.

• Jeff Hardy was apparently supposed to win the TNA championship back from Ken Anderson at the recent Impact taping, but due to his court issues, they've decided to hold off on that. I don't see why they'd want to take it off Anderson so fast. Maybe it'll happen at Against All Odds (which I'll have my typical live results/review up once the ppv starts)
• More back-and-forth rumormill stuff about Sting. The moment you hear "he's a lock to join WWE", there's always something contradictory saying that he hasn't, which is followed up with more "yes he has". I've assumed for a while that he wouldn't sign, but the longer this contradictory stuff goes on, the less and less I'm convinced that there's even a slight, slight possibility.
• Percy Watson is back on the road with Smackdown. I'm assuming they want to call him up to the roster, but have absolutely no idea how to use him, so they're not pulling the trigger yet. I can't blame them. I don't know where he'd fit either, especially with WrestleMania coming up and them needing to focus on the things that will actually be a part of the pay-per-view.
• Kurt Angle talked on Twitter about how the Jarrett/Karen thing is dragging their kids into the mix and painting Kurt as a bad guy. Some people bought into it and think that he's shooting. Come on. He isn't.
• Apparently, Edge had requested to work with Christian for WrestleMania this year, but the idea was turned down. It seems like the reason would be the standard "WWE doesn't think much of Christian" situation. Maybe they'll do it next year, seeing as how Edge has claimed he will retire soon. I can't see them skipping out on a money feud like that. Maybe they just don't want it to happen at Mania.
• Richie Steamboat continues to receive good reviews in FCW and may be called up to the main roster soon. The detractor is his look, but his in-ring work is apparently so good that it may make up for it. I've only seen one of his early matches, and you could tell he was green, but had potential. I'm certainly not opposed to giving people a chance
• TNA Films? Come on. Everyone already jokes about TNA employing "WWE rejects", repeating the same storylines but in an even worse fashion (like EV2.0), and constantly trying to be WWE, and now they want to copy the absolute worst thing WWE has right now that even they can't get right?! How long before Dixie announces that they're going to start their own football league? 
• Boy did R-Truth come out of Raw looking like a piece of garbage or what? He had a little less *umph* in his entrance than normal, then gets booed for saying Green Bay instead of Milwaukee (which I'll admit, is something I probably would have done too, considering how you could naturally assume that they'd be ok with it and just cheer for the champs), fucks up several moves in his short match with Mason Ryan, loses the match via submission like a helpless animal, and then the rest of the night everyone makes fun of him saying the wrong city. OUCH. 
• McMahon announces on Raw that WrestleMania is going to have a guest host and that it's a big name. Hm....I'm intrigued, and I'm waiting for the moment on Monday night when I go "ugh, that sucks". Everyone's hoping for The Rock, but I don't like to get my hopes up. I'm hoping it isn't Ryan Seacrest or Lady Gaga or someone that has nothing to do with wrestling. 
• The Usos breaking up? I hope not, but really, who didn't see that coming potentially? WWE seems to think breaking up tag teams is awesome, but they never follow through with it. If the Usos can't find a purpose together, they sure as hell stand no chance separately. We're looking at another Smith/Kidd, Primo/Carlito go-nowhere outcome if they split them up. Then they'll probably be released.
• Byron Saxton was eliminated from NXT. You can read my thoughts here. 
• The next WrestleMania will be in Miami. If Edge truly will retire at next year's WrestleMania, it's a shame he can't go out in Toronto. I'm sure wrestling Christian at WM in Toronto would have been awesome for him.
• WWE released their quarter financial earnings and to no surprise, pay-per-view buyrates are down. I guess that 5 dollar increase isn't working for you, is it? I'll never understand how some businesses think "if people don't have money to spend in this economy, lets boost our prices, because people will be more inclined to pay more, if they weren't paying for it when it was cheaper". Walmart's succeeding for a reason...CHEAPER prices.
• Triple H wants to revamp the developmental system, including hiring Jim Ross as the recruiter? Fucking-A! That would almost make up for The Chaperone.........almost.
• Kelly Kelly may be turning heel? I hope not. She gets a big pop as it is, and who would they turn face to counter it? Plus, where does that leave Kong?

The third elimination of NXT season 4 is...Byron Saxton.

My take on the situation? I actually thought Johnny Curtis was going this week. It seemed like he didn't have as much going for him on the show and although I was initially impressed (and I still like him), I thought Curtis didn't have a shot at winning it after the past few weeks, but Saxton potentially did...especially once they announced that Saxton and Ziggler were a team and that the winners challenge for the tag titles and how Ziggler has a prominent spot on the show (at least verbally). Saxton will be on the Raw or Smackdown roster eventually. He impressed me much more than I was expecting due to his commentary career. 

As for the next elimination, I'll stick with what I thought would have happened this week and go with Johnny Curtis. That only leaves Brodus Clay and Derrick Bateman for the finals. Seeing as how Del Rio is pretty much a main eventer now, he won't be taking a step downward to win (or lose) the tag titles, so that means Derrick Bateman wins NXT so he and Bryan (who have been a good duo since the start) can challenge for, and likely win the tag titles down the line after WrestleMania.

SIDE NOTE: Highlight of the night without a doubt was Dolph Ziggler calling out the Green Bay/Milwaukee confusion and then elbow-dropping the cheese-head that Derrick Bateman had brought out. I legit laughed out loud on that one.

Undertaker? Sting? Jericho coming back to "Save_Us 2-21-11"? The horrible forthcoming appearance of Justin Bieber at WrestleMania? What are we in store for in regards to this promotional tactic?

My apologies for being a week late on this, but nonetheless, my viewpoint has stayed the same since the first promo. Actually, that's a lie. My first impression was that I had just fast-forwarded on my DVR past some video game commercial. I didn't realize it was for World Wrestling Entertainment. However, when I rewound it, I immediately thought "hm...I wonder why they're bothering to promote the Undertaker's return and eradicate any suspense...oh well".

Soon afterward, I came across a laundry list of "suspects" from fellow fans trying to figure out who it is. Some had a modicum of thought but just never seem to be plausible (for instance, Awesome Kong is in the company, but I doubt they'd bring her in by showing what is clearly a man in a coat). Some were absolutely ridiculous (for instance, people suggesting it'll be the return of Matt Hardy). But it really comes down to 2 names when people are discussing this: Sting and Undertaker.

The past few days, everyone immediately goes to Sting. All us fans jump the gun at times and this was no different, with people suggesting dream feuds he'll have within the next year, to the point where people are discussing which opponents he'll face at which pay-per-views, despite not having any firm evidence that he's even signed with the company. As each day passes, it seems less and less likely that Sting actually WILL go to WWE. You can't necessarily rule it out completely, but as I've said before, expect the least surprising outcome when it comes to WWE (and the answer that makes the least sense when it comes to TNA...case in point, Fortune being They). I'd love to see Sting under Vince's paycheck, especially if it meant a confrontation between The Icon and The Phenom at WrestleMania (technically for the third year in a row, considering how HBK uses the nickname The Icon too...but that's beside the point). Do I expect it to happen? Nope. I didn't expect John Morrison to get the upset and win the Royal Rumble, I didn't expect the big story of the Nexus's bigger plan to actually be something more than a stall, and I'm not expecting the Miz to leave WrestleMania the WWE champion rather than dropping it to John Cena. It's just the safe bet to assume those things, just as the safe bet here is to assume that 2-21-11 refers to the Undertaker's return, not the sudden acquisition of what many call "the biggest wrestling star to have never worked for Vince McMahon".

The evidence is there in the promos: 1) it is mysterious and so is the Undertaker, 2) black coat, which Taker wears, 3) black boots, same case, 4) fire for the numbers, something Taker is associated with, and as of this writing, they even mentioned graves. Taker was last seen in the buried alive match. Pretty open and shut case right?

That's not to say that WWE doesn't pull their shockers out there (for better or worse upon viewer's discretion). 2-21-11 could change at the last minute and either be used to promote someone (or some THING) else entirely than the Undertaker. Hell, it could fall into the same abyss that previous storylines like Hade Vansen's promo did and go nowhere and then disappear with no explanation. Until 2-21-11 makes itself abundantly clear, or at least until more clues are sent our way, I'll be sticking with the simplest guess, that it is about the Undertaker's return. We'll just have to see.

UPDATE 2/15/11: Well, they flat out showed Taker in the promo for tonight. Speculation over. 

UPDATE 2/21/11: Mystery solved. Undertaker as expected.

It's time for the Elimination Chamber, or as I like to call it, "The Roadblock to WrestleMania". The challenger has won his spot at WrestleMania by winning the Royal Rumble and now it is up to the champion to earn his spot by retaining here. There's a double-edged sword for this pay-per-view. Personally, I'm a fan of when the champion isn't in the chamber match, but rather, the EC is used for determining the #1 contender for the champion that the Royal Rumble winner hasn't chosen. However, because of that, they give you title matches like the Miz against Jerry Lawler to fill in the spot. Personally, I'd rather see them use that opportunity to give the IC and US title holders a shot at their respective brand's top title, but then again, I'm not the type of guy that would book Hornswoggle to do better in the Royal Rumble than former world champions.


WWE Championship: The Miz (c) vs. Jerry "The King" Lawler
Come on. If you have any, and I mean even .01% thought in your mind that Jerry Lawler is going to win the title here, you're out of your mind. The way they've booked the Miz with this title reign is that he's completely not qualified to hold the title, so I have no doubt in my mind that they won't give him a strong win here, unfortunately. Instead, they'll have Michael Cole screw Lawler out of the match, setting up that "final straw that broke the camel's back" so they can have a match between Lawler and Cole at WrestleMania.

PREDICTION: The Miz retains. I'd bet all of my money on it. Want to take the bet?


Raw Elimination Chamber: John Cena vs. John Morrison vs. R-Truth vs. Randy Orton vs. Sheamus vs. CM Punk
I'm surprised that R-Truth is in here in a way, but in another way, I'm not. He's the quick elimination. I originally expected Triple H to be a part of this instead of him (and if they want to, the could easily just write Truth off and replace him). So unless there's the possibility of the fatal four-way between Miz, Orton, Cena, and Punk, which I don't think is happening now that they've just said "fuck it, let's ignore Cena/Punk and go into Orton/Punk and hope nobody notices that we didn't finish that feud", I think it's safe to say Cena wins here. And what are the order of eliminations? I'd have to guess they'll screw Morrison here once more and it'll go this way: Morrison or Sheamus eliminates Truth (probably Sheamus). Sheamus then eliminates Morrison. Orton eliminates Sheamus. Punk eliminates Orton. Cena eliminates Punk.

PREDICTION: John Cena wins and faces and defeats the Miz for the WWE title at WrestleMania's main event.


Smackdown Elimination Chamber [World Heavyweight Championship Match]: Edge (c) vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Wade Barrett vs. Kane vs. Rey Mysterio vs. Drew McIntyre
I'm confused as to why McIntyre is in the match instead of Big Show. That surprised me a lot. There's only one winner here, Edge. I don't think that this chamber match will be as good as Raw's, considering Kane's limitations, McIntyre not have a ton of steam behind him, and Mysterio's injury (and repetitiveness). As far as the eliminations go? Not as clear cut as the Raw one, but I'd say the finals are Edge and Barrett or Edge and Ziggler (NOTE: Ziggler is supposed to be out of this match now, but I'm not buying it). Just a ballpark guess, I'll say the first eliminated is McIntyre, then Kane, then Ziggler, then Mysterio, then Barrett, but I don't have a ton of faith in that prediction, especially since it seems like they could be trying to turn Kane back into a tweener.

PREDICTION: Edge 100% definitely without a shadow of a doubt retains.


Kofi Kingston vs. Alberto Del Rio
We all saw this coming, so no surprises here. It also won't be a surprise when Kofi takes the hit. We're talking the guy who is challenging for the world title at WrestleMania, against a guy who seems to have won the IC title as a means of staying relevant. Kofi's been in a bit of a slump ever since his program with Orton ended on Raw, and although he's stepped his mic work up, it doesn't seem to have yielded a main event reward yet. He's definitely a stepping stone here.


PREDICTION: Alberto Del Rio has to come out of this either with a rather clean win, or a rather dirty and powerful disqualification. He will not lose by any means other than a DQ.


Tag Team Championship: Santino Marella & Vladimir Kozlov (c) vs. Justin Gabriel & Heath Slater
The question that settles the outcome of this match is "in what capacity will the Corre and the Nexus compete at WrestleMania?" because there's a good opportunity that they're facing each other, and from the looks of this, it could be for the tag team championship in some sort of Freebird rule.

PREDICTION: New tag champs.

I think the only thing left time-wise is the obligatory shitty divas match...probably Eve defending against Layla or Michelle.