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WWE SummerSlam 2012 PPV Review and Results

Watch WWE SummerSlam 2012 ppv live online coverage of results and review here. Triple H vs Brock Lesnar. CM Punk defends the WWE Championship against John Cena and Big Show. Daniel Bryan versus Kane. Sheamus defends the World Heavyweight Championship against Alberto Del Rio. Christ Jericho vs Dolph Ziggler. Santino Marella vs Antonio Cesaro for the United States championship. The Miz vs Rey Mysterio for the Intercontinental Championship. Kofi Kingston & R-Truth vs the Prime Time Players. I would expect Damien Sandow vs Brodus Clay. You can check out my predictions here.

United States Championship [YouTube Pre-Show]: Santino Marella (c) vs. Antonio Cesaro
Once again, it looks like the YouTube feed isn't working for me. I'd like to watch one, haha. The feed literally JUST came on to show me the replay of Antonio Cesaro pinning Santino Marella.

WINNER (and new United States Champion): Antonio Cesaro via pinfall.
Didn't get to watch the match, and I don't really like the idea of Cesaro as champion instead of some other people, but I'm glad that Santino dropped the title as there's more of a chance that it can mean something now. Hopefully, that happens.

Friend of mine just brought up a good point - why isn't Josh Mathews on the commentary team? It feels like an episode of Raw with just Cole and Lawler. I agree.

Vickie Guerrero comes out to introduce Dolph Ziggler. What do you think, start the pay-per-view off with a bang and then go downhill?

Dolph Ziggler vs. Chris Jericho
Jericho's got his ribs taped. So far the match is pretty much Jericho dominating, schooling the younger wrestler. We're definitely expecting this to be a Jericho win and a Ziggler cash-in later, now that this is the opening match of the night. Nice hurricanrana from Jericho on the top rope. Ziggler hits the Zig Zag, but Jericho kicks out. Vickie causes some interference and Ziggler gets a two-count with an inside cradle. Walls of Jericho gets locked in - the ruthless version. Ziggler taps out.

WINNER: Chris Jericho via submission.
Good match. Not as good as I was hoping, but then again, I had really, really high expectations for it.

Commercial time. Ugh. Slim Jim isn't the same without Randy Savage.

Piers Morgan is in the crowd, sitting behind Lawler.

Striker is backstage talking to Paul Heyman and Brock Lesnar. Heyman is talking, not Lesnar, thankfully.

Daniel Bryan vs. Kane
Waste of a match. Slow. Uninteresting so far. Daniel Bryan's entrance was more exciting than the match at the moment. Kane's shoe is untied...that's what we're focusing on the most. We're waiting for a botch with that. Daniel Bryan goes for a headbutt from the top rope, but Kane catches him and chokeslams him. Kane picks him up for a tombstone, but Daniel Bryan puts him in a small package and wins. Wow, that was random.

WINNER: Daniel Bryan via pinfall.
About as good as I was expecting. This wasn't SummerSlam-worthy at all in my mind.

Backstage, Kane is flipping out, looking for Kane. Josh Mathews comes up to talk to him, Kane tosses him offscreen.

Intercontinental Championship: The Miz (c) vs. Rey Mysterio
Rey comes out dressed as Batman. I'm hoping Miz comes out dressed as Bane. For that matter, get Maryse to come back dressed as Catwoman. Miz's "Awesome" text is out on the stage from WrestleMania. Nice Torture Rack style backbreaker of sorts from Miz. Miz is hyping himself a lot in this match - big fan. Gotta love the Miz. I hope that doesn't lead to Mysterio winning the title. Rey hits the 619. Miz moves out of the way for the splash. Rey flips him up for a pin and Miz kicks out. Miz hits Skull Crushing Finale and wins.

WINNER: The Miz via pinfall.
I enjoyed when Miz was in charge and taunting and such. A little better than expected, but I hope that they don't have a long feud. I'd rather see Miz face some other people and have a really good IC title reign.

Raw Active commercial. Now Teddy Long is backstage talking with Eve Torres. CM Punk is waiting outside AJ Lee's door. He goes in, she's all smiles. He says triple threat matches are unfair to the champ and she's doing this to get back at him for the proposal. He says he'll win again and everyone will show him some respect.

World Heavyweight Championship: Sheamus (c) vs. Alberto Del Rio
Mike Chioda got a nice chant coming out before the match started. Feels like their introductions are taking forever. Sheamus and Del Rio are basically just fighting each other like a street fight, clawing at each other and such. I hope they keep this as stiff as it seems now (but with more intensity). Sheamus picks Del Rio up in an Electric Chair (which doesn't happen) and in the process, Del Rio undoes the turnbuckle. This has become too slow and it's hurting the match, I think. It needs to pick up the pace like it did at the beginning. Del Rio gets the cross-armbreaker on Sheamus. I doubt he'll be tapping. Sheamus picks him up instead and slams him down to get out of it. Sheamus hits White Noise. Del Rio kicks out. Del Rio dodges the Brogue Kick, but gets a spear in the corner instead. Sheamus starts doing the 10 attacks to the chest. Ricardo tosses a shoe into the ring. Sheamus catches it and uses it. He pins Del Rio, but Del Rio gets his foot on the ropes, though Chioda doesn't notice and awards the match to Sheamus.

WINNER: Sheamus via pinfall.
Meh. The ending was interesting, I'll give them that. Again, I don't want a rematch.

Del Rio and Ricardo are still in the ring after Sheamus leaves. Del Rio leaves, pissed. Ok, that was a waste of time. They've stalled a lot.

Speaking of time-wasting, here's an ad for the National Guard.

Tag Team Championship: Kofi Kingston & R-Truth (c) vs. The Prime Time Players
It took them months and Kofi and Truth FINALLY have matching outfits. Pretty even. I hope Young and O'Neil win, just out of necessity to drop the title, kind of like with Cesaro. Nice crossbody from Kofi on the outside onto Titus. Darren rolls up R-Truth, but Truth kicks out. Truth hits his finisher and pins Darren Young for the win.

WINNERS: Kofi Kingston and R-Truth via pinfall.
Not a big fan of it. This pay-per-view is so lackluster for "the second biggest ppv of the year". That seems to be a regular thing, lately.

Lots of time wasting with Axxess (I never know if I've spelled that right, but I'm too lazy to check at the moment).

WWE Championship [Triple Threat Match]: CM Punk (c) vs. John Cena vs. Big Show
Cena looks surprised at the boos. Nobody else is surprised. Punk's tights are more along the Bret Hart style instead of Randy Savage style. Not bad. Big Show suplexes both men at the same time. CM Punk tries to pick Big Show up for the GTS, but can't. Cena's able to pick up Show for the AA, though, but Punk knocks them down. Show does the Vader Bomb, hitting Cena (Punk moves out of the way). That could have been a bad botch - glad to see they didn't screw it up and get injured. Nice spot with Show catching Punk's suicide dive and throwing him into the ropes on the outside. Punk hits the elbow drop on Show, but Show tosses him off. Punk puts Show in some kind of a submission, but Show gets out. Cena jumps on and puts him in the STF. Show stands up and falls back into the turnbuckle to get Cena off his back. Punk hits Show with his springboard clothesline. They go back to double-teaming Show. Cena has the STF on as Punk has his move from earlier locked in. Big Show taps out. The ref calls for the bell. Out comes AJ Lee. Punk says he wants the WWE Universe to decide, tweet and such. Big Show chokeslams both of them at the same time. He pins Cena, who kicks out. He pins Punk, who kicks out. Cena hits the AA on Show. Punk throws Cena out of the ring, pins Show, and wins. What did I tell you?

WINNER: CM Punk via pinfall.
Knew it. Just going to say that.

They're stalling so much with this post-match celebration. Lawler and Cole don't even have anything to say.

Now they're stalling with a commercial for The Day and talking about all the celebs in the crowd.

Now they're showing the pre-show stuff.

Now they're wasting even more time with some live musical performance. Wow. This is awful. Even a DIVAS match would make more sense than all this shit. Speak of the divas, they're on stage dancing. They keep showing the commentators and announcers and such dancing to this. This is so, so awful. I think I just got another nomination for the "Worst" section of the Best and Worst of the Year Awards.

If you haven't left yet, thinking that WWE was done with the ppv a half hour ago, I commend you.

Triple H vs. Brock Lesnar
HHH better lose to Lesnar here. They killed the lights for the introduction. I like that. Brawling, as expected. HHH clotheslines Lesnar out of the ring. So on and so forth. Lesnar takes his gloves off. Lesnar's got a bloody nose. Good German suplex from Lesnar. Zzzz. HHH throws Lesnar into the commentary table, then hits him in the stomach. They bring up Lesnar's stomach problems from the past. HHH goes for Pedigree, Lesnar twists into F5, HHH escapes and hits the Pedigree. Lesnar kicks out. Lesnar low-blows HHH, but the ref was told not to DQ anyone. Lesnar hits the F5, but HHH kicks out. Lesnar gets the kimura (sp?) on HHH, who reaches the ropes, but of course that doesn't matter. He gets out of it anyway though. HHH hits another Pedigree. Before HHH can pin him, Lesnar locks the kimura in again. HHH taps out.

WINNER: Brock Lesnar via submission.
Glad that Lesnar won. Now I don't have a reason to complain about HHH not putting someone over.

Crowd starts chanting "you tapped out". LMAO.


Reasoning: It wasn't SO bad that I hated it, but it just wasn't great, in any way whatsoever. A big reason for this was that it just felt like a 3-hour Raw and it really had FAR too much time wasted on it.